Anger is natural. It's part of the force. You just have to learn to hang out with it.

-Tori Amos (and no, I'm not angry)

This week was...I'm not too sure actually...it went by too damn fast. Monday and Tuesday were definitely a blur. Wednesday was stressful (as all Wednesdays are). Friday, my aunt visited, which was great. I highly recommend the Tibetan restaurant here. Yesterday was rehearsal and another contest...and now I'm sitting here...doing my best at the homework thing.

The next two weeks are going to be painful. I have so much on my plate...a lot of commitments...and I'm so afraid I am going to break down. But usually when stuff like this happens, I become surprisingly calm, so I am counting on that to take over.

I'd like to thank HGTV for being the background of my home life this week. It's nice to know that people are improving their places all over the country. Seriously, anything that gets me away from the food network is a miracle. Also, a thanks goes out to my high school best friend, Adrian, for the multitudes of e-mails sent this week.

I've noticed that I've become a bit more talkative lately. Part of it is the delirium of classes, part of it is the fact that I am more comfortable up here, and part of it is me being sick of people's interpretations of my "quietness". I come off as a snob a lot apparantly...which if you know me is definitely not the case (well I hope). Plus the quietness has contributed to my invisibility here. I figured that I would freak people out more with my stream of consciousness, than just being quiet. Luckily I have Susan who just makes a quote page out of all of her friend's interesting sayings. So should I blurt out to the world that I found a relevant article and want to have it's babies, or just stay quiet? Decisions.

I backed into a concrete thing yesterday in Terre Haute...it scared the crap out of me, but luckily everything on the car was fine. I love my Honda, even after her first fender-bender. My nephew also turned 1 yesterday...so cute.

40 days.

"to be interested in the changing seasons is...a happier state of mind than to be hopelessly in love with spring"

-George Santayana

Let's see if I can post a picture on this thing...my connection with the lines of power

It's starting to get cool up here. One thing I like about living up north (yes, this is the north to me) is the four seasons. Fall here is beautiful. It rains a lot, which I hate, but on a sunny day with all of the colors, this place is amazingly beautiful...not quite as beautiful as spring here, but close enough. Fall is my favorite season for sure...the colors, the smells, football games, marching band, fall clothes...proof that there is beauty in dying. Winter is going to suck though.

I updated on Friday, which is far too recent. I actually haven't seen much of my apartment in the past week. Friday was honestly the surprise of the century for me. The day kind of sucked because I was working on assignments and such, but the evening/night was wonderful. SLIS had a beautiful reception at the Woodburn House. Large events like that make me pretty weary, but it ended up being really nice. Everybody was dressed up, many conversations were had, new classes were created, careers were discussed, alcohol was free. Afterwards (probably as a result of the free bar), around 30 people or so decided to go to the vid, some bar and hang out. Everybody was happy and playing pool...I got to see Kristina and Chris (what fate!)...I got to see half of my program drunk (myself included)...I got to see one of my professors playing pool...overall, so much better than class. I have a new-found respect for half of these people, mainly because everybody let loose some. It was also proven to me this weekend that I am not invisible to men up here which is nice to know...

Yesterday I spent 12 hours at Northview, well a few were in Indianapolis for a competition...basically the next 5 weeks or so will be filled with contests. The announcer forgot to call my name out as staff, and Bob actually noticed it, which was impressive. Katie Townsend's subsequent arguement against Michael's name being called off first was incredibly funny...yeah women's rights.

I'm taking some big steps this week...well one. I am going to send in my first job application tomorrow, thus beginning 8 months of job-finding hell. Another one of those hellish "learning experience"s. I can sum up my entire grad school stay as a "learning experience". I guess it's how we become wise as we get older.

You only grow when you are alone.

-Paul Newman

As long as I don't grow outward, I will be fine.

I have a little time between now and work, so I thought I'd update. The bus driver took the wrong turn today, thinking that he was driving the C route instead of the 6 route. People got so pissed...granted they had places to go, but essentially they were being dropped of at the same place, so I didn't understand the wild uproar. I will definitely think twice before I would ever criticize anyone like that, because everybody makes unintentional mistakes...it's the intentional ones we need to worry about, or take to mind.

I am at school for a long time today...my class was cancelled, so I am going to work on stuff in it's place, in the hope that I don't have to come here on Sunday. I have an ALA meeting tonight and a reception to attend, which should be fun...dressing up is always fun.

Found out some interesting news last night at Northview. Tomorrow, I'll be with them all day doing the rehearsal and contest thing.

My client for the online information retrieval is british...soo freaking cool. I am producing research for her next book, which is really exciting.

Okay, I am late for work...have a good weekend everybody!

"Find something you're passionate about and keep tremendously interested in it. "

-Julia Child

This past week has been crazy. I'm finally into things...and there's not much time to breathe. Both work situations are fine right now. I'm becoming acquainted to the library job. Northview starts their competition season next weekend. Yesterday we had a six hour rehearsal in the 90 degree weather. It was long, but I won't ever have to worry about this kind of stuff after next month...I'll miss marching band, probably the most because it's the form of colorguard I have participated in every year since 1997.

After rehearsal yesterday I went to school (yeah, I know) with Susan to work on our dialog assignment. It is difficult sometimes figuring out some of the questions, but when something makes sense, it is so cool. I think that's why I like online searching so much. It's a challenge, but you do see results. Lokman, our professor, came in to answer our questions and we ended up talking with him about everything from football to where we came from (he knew that UGA's mascot was the bulldog). Anyways, it was nice. He has totally changed my perspective on professors.

I have so many assignments to do, it's not funny. I had one due today- a paper on the concept of humanities...I don't think one person in the class is excited about posting their thoughts on oncourse, to be criticized by other members of the class...probably the only assignment in that class I will ever refute. I also have to start my cataloging assignment, since Charla and I like getting stuff done early.

Basically if you don't know me from school, this entry had to be extremely boring. I think this is the way it should have always been though...thoroughly immersed in my interest. Other things have happened in the non-school sense :) don't get me wrong. Right now, I am interested in completing school because I want a good job. Basically if you're interested in drama, I don't think you'll read about it in my life for a long time. I like it so much better that way.

9/11/01

"Oh, God, the great and terrible beauty of it."

Part of me wishes that I would have taken a class in summer I session, so I could go ahead and graduate in December. But the combination of no six month leases at my apartment and the level of work in my classes for fall semester makes me breathe a sigh of relief. It's just going to suck in spring...watching a lot of my friends get jobs because they have already graduated, while I am taking two classes and hopefully still working two jobs. I just feel sometimes, even in the middle of the craziness, that I am sitting around twiddling my thumbs waiting for something to happen.

I finally got in touch with my D.C. friend. She's okay, but terribly busy. She also decided to plant a little idea in my head that has been growing since last week. It's a big decision to make, but if everything goes well, what a great accomplishment it will be.

I like my classes. My boss is my cataloging partner, which is extremely conveinent. The humanities class is going to royally kick my butt with all of the work, but it is useful work...some stuff to put on resumes. I am also learning how to searh Dialog in online information and retrieval...so if you read rants in the next 5 or 6 weeks about it, you'll know why. I'm trying to not freak out about all of the work I have to do and all of the frustration ahead. I'm used to this, so it shouldn't be bad. One thing I can say about this year is that I am lacking any distrations. I'm not attached to anybody or thing or activity, so all of my focus can be concentrated on doing well here, graduating, and moving ON (hopefully away from the midwest).

I'm trying not to complain about things, because I have my life...it hasn't been ruined by mother nature. I can't even imagine. It's hard to have visited New Orleans for the Sugar Bowl in 2002. I loved that trip and have so many memories from it. It would be horrible if that memory was my everyday life. Anybody not affected by this has some serious issues.

Ob la di ob la da life goes on brahhh... la la how the life goes on...

Ode to My Lost Friend...

So I have known one of my best friends, Susan, since the sixth grade. It was obvious even back then, being the military brat she is, that she was destined for great things. We endured high school math, history, english and broadcasting together. She covered for my first boyfriend and I when we had a house double date and he and I went to "get a soda" in the garage. She has always done well in school and is one of the most confident, caring people I know. We went to college together and managed to remain friends when she spent a year abroad and I was lost in color guard land. Last year we both moved to the midwest for graduate school...she in Chicago at the prestigious University of Chicago, and I at the beautiful IU. Although we never saw each other, we still managed communication.

She started working in D.C. and has dropped off the face of the earth. None of the old group can get in touch with her. It's obviously some covert training program, but I am worried nontheless. I miss my friend. I should have tagged her. I am hoping she resurfaces next year by the time I will potentially move there.

In other less Dan-Brown-worthy news, it's raining a lot here in the aftermath of Hurricane Katrina...proving that women can be bitches from time to time. My work schedule takes up every day of the week with the exception of Sundays. My first classes are tomorrow. I have already signed up for my client search project in online information retrieval. I will be working for a history prof. on compiling a bibliography of primary and secondary resources of oustiders' accounts of the French revolution. Should be difficult, but it will be so much better than sitting in a classroom drowning in theory.

Everybody else has started school

Honestly...Indiana starts really late or something. But with no fall break and no labor day and three weeks of Christmas, I guess it makes sense. It's just weird though, because everybody else is into the swing of things by now, and I'm twiddling my thumbs waiting for stuff to happen.

I had a terrible interview for the library job, but somehow they offered me the position. I am psyched about it because it means experience to put on my resume. I will be working in collection development and with the subject area librarians, so I'll get to meet a lot of people and see a variety of jobs. The only thing I am scared about is taking three classes (it's like taking 5 in undergrad), and working 10 hours a week in the library and 3 days a week at Northview. I usually do better in school when I am busy though, so we'll see.

My first day back at Northview was Tuesday. I walked in and the girls all started "awww"ing and saying "we were wondering when you'd be back". It was such a sweet gesture from them...they're a hard group to break into. Michael and Katie are back which is great (the guard looks so much better than they did last year at this time because of them) and Jessica is a great dance tech. Rochelle is also on staff this year (she marched crown this summer and graduated from Northview last year), and she is such a sweet person. Tonight, her, Whitney (Bob and Ruth Ann's daughter who was on the hornline-also a very nice person) talked about crown, since I had no clue how the summer went. I'm glad they got to do it and had fun (and not to mention had each other).

Tomorrow I only have errands to do, which is nice. Saturday I have to be at Northview and then Chris and Kristina will come for dinner and to hang out...haven't seen them since June. Sunday, I'll get to see Jeff again (we need some serious pool time). Monday begins the craziness known as the last year of academic limbo. Get excited!

Another one?

So, yes, I have created another blog...I still have the livejournal, but will not continue to write in it. It was definitely my least favorite of blogs, and like some people, I desire change in my life.
I spent a week in Atlanta after I completed my internship. I had the best time. I went to the city 4 times (honestly, I had lived there all my life and never went). Part of me wishes that I had gone to college in the city, but that would have completely obliterated my past. As much as I loathe the past two years, it's still a part of me. But I enjoyed every moment of seeing my best friend from fse 2000 at UGA, dinner with Greg at Everybodys, Ikea with Paige, Adrian, and Marvin, and the Park Tavern with Krista. I got glimpses of my upcoming adult life and while I know it sucks to be in the working world, I am so ready to be there. I have been ready to be an adult since I got to college. I am so lucky though to have my friends...the ones who stuck around.
The career path is finally set...I am still dabbling into corporate librarianship, because I like business, I just don't want to work in a cubicle. Academia seems exciting too, so I guess I'll shoot for the stars.
I got back into Bloomington tonight. It's 12:30am and my apartment is still a mess. But I had to finish my internship written report and I went to dinner with Susan, so everything will have to wait until tomorrow. I go back to Northview tomorrow for my last fall season of ever doing color guard. I have a job interview sometime this week for a job in the main library. I need money so badly, especially for some of the stuff I have coming for me second semester.
My goal for this year in to put my past behind me, which entails so much. Obviously, I don't want everything gone but letting go of what you're comfortable with is the best solution to so many problems.